CelebrityFIST!

No jump - too lazy

Katy Perry; NYC (04/13/2010) - its really not fair someone as irritating as her should look even partly sexy…

Tila Nguyen; still alive and as skanky as ever at Sirius XM (04/12/2010) - from a simply ‘ho’ point of view; I’d hit it … then I’d HIT it (I’ll leave it up to you in what order I mean)

Zoe Saldana; Self Magazine (05/2010) - I actually liked her more BEFORE ‘Star Trek‘.

Holly Peers; Nuts UK (04/2010) - because you can NEVER have enough British tits

Last (but or so not least) Christina Hendricks; Unknown Photoshoot - things I wanna do with her would be illegal just THINKING about them… 

Okay, I’m still looking for stuff for our nightly news segment but stumbled across this.  She’s too hot in this set for a Celeb Goodies post so she gets a solo shot.  I give you Eve Wyrwal in Nuts UK.  Which month?  WHO CARES!   (more…)

Halle Berry went to the “Keep A Child Alive” party (shit, you keep the alive by partying?  Well, I DID keep many stripper kid’s fed as I was getting those “special” dances  )  and we can see two ways that Halle intends to keep children alive.

Actually that top looks really tight.  Those milk puppies look like they just might pop ‘over the top’.  Well, one can hope.  All I know is that the drinks are on her (and probably FROM her)!

(lights cigarette)

For the record, I don’t normally smoke inside the house.  Hell, I don’t normally smoke period, but things have sucked at work and after barrelling thru 18 beers this past weekend (and half a bottle of tequila); I needed to destroy another vital organ…

Monday sucked as I didn’t get home until sometime around 11:30pm so I wasn’t in the mood to blog.  Hey at least I’m upfront about it.

Enough chatter - this chick’s name is Sammy Braddy and like most British chicks (apparently) she’s stacked like tits were goin’ outta style.  Must the crappy British diet or something all all the royal inbreeding.  (shrugs)

Anyway here she is in People Magazine - Australia  . I don’t get it our tabloids are full of the latest star garbage and everywhere else, its tits.  WTF?  I mean I know were repressed but COME ON! 

In case you’re wondering - yeah I’m gonna be this bitchy for the rest of the night.  Fair warning.

Bald dude’s lucky his wife is on the phone… 

How about Blake Lively at the US Open showing off her puffy nipples?  Better?

Thought so. (more…)

Reminds me - must buy milk tomorrow…

I don’t know much about Eva Amurri.  I mean I know she’s Susan Sarandon’s kid (which is fucking obvious; I mean LOOK AT THOSE PUPPIES!!! ) but other than that?  Zilch-o.

All I know is I would so play “World War II” with her - that is a two front war where I invade her southern flank while attempting to blitzkrieg across her face; all the while planning a secret invasion of Bungholia.

…

Shit, just lost a division of paratroopers!!  Dammit I’ll be back…

No, really.  I didn’t need to know how big your vagina is now…

I really tried to lust for Katy Perry.  Really.  She’s got big tits.  I mean, how do you screw that up?  Seriously? (more…)

Lily Allen is apparently back on the offensive after Lady Gaga has basically taken over the spotlight with her cameltoes and idiotic fashions.  Granted Gaga is getting attention in a stupid way - but this is WAR, man!  Well at least at a highly superficial and immature level.

So Lily is bringing out the big guns.  Well actually more like - “nearly medium size” guns.  The few days have been “Lily Allen tits go to the beach” or “Lily Allen flashes boob at videoshoot.”

Of course, Lily tries to play it off:

LILY ALLEN was left red-faced during a videoshoot on Monday (01Jun09) when a wardrobe malfunction left her baring a breast.
The Smile hitmaker donned a full-length one-shouldered dress to film the promo for upcoming single 22.
But a sudden gust of wind left the singer baring all and she was forced to hurriedly cover up.
A source tells Britain’s Daily Mirror newspaper, “Lily is in fantastic shape and was keen to show off her curves. As with most of her videos, there are quite a few surprises in store.”  (ContactMusic)

Riiiight.

Invariably, Lady Gaga and Lily Allen will have to meet at Picadilly Circus for the fate of the world as they battle mano-a-mano … or maybe “Cameltoe of Doom” vs. “Third Nipple of Hell”.   My money’s on the tit.

This is Emmanuelle Chriqui. I think I posted some pics before of her but I did not know she had such a big rack. Why doesn’t someone TELL me these things?? I don’t even know who she is. I looked up in Wiki and she’s apparently been on Entourage and The OC.

…oh, well, now it all makes sense. I only watch good television.

Anyhoo, here’s some pics of her from something.

Of course, I’m not sure the backless thing works because her boobs look like their getting ready for the Winter Migration south.  On the other hand, its always nice when a woman enters the room before she enters the room!