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CelebrityFIST! » WTF? Weather Report

FORECAST:  Hot.  With moments of extreme hotness.

How hot?  Take one naked Megan Fox, put her on all fours, shove a baseball bat up her ass, hang the “Stars & Stripes” off the bat.  Plant Roman candles all around her.  Have them go off while the Boston Philharmonic plays the the last part of the 1812 Overture (cannons included).

Still NOT hot enough, okay.  Right now the temp is fucking 102 at 5:40PM!!  I’m drunk (what else is there to do?).

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::rolls off the bed laughing::

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