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CelebrityFIST! » Archive for Tuesday, December 18th, 2007

Archive for December 18th, 2007

Dec 18 2007

I Was Too Shocked To Come Up With A Title…

Posted by: Chaoz in WTF?, Michael Jackson, Medical Bloopers

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Words cannot describe what has happened to Michael Jackson’s face. The easiest way to describe it is that Michael’s face looks like Britney’s life. I’m not even sure what he’s doing here. Possibly buying books like “Plastic Surgery For Dummies” and “Boy’s Life”, but I could be wrong.

Okay, I’ve looked at these long enough. Now if you will excuse me, I need to throw up.

mjackson03.jpgmjackson01.jpg

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Dec 18 2007

Gratuitous Goodies For 12/18/07

Posted by: Chaoz in Gratuitous Goodies

Old-Tyme Shannon Elizabeth goodness:

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British Chick Kerry Katona:

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The ever delicious Dita Von Teese:

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Samarie Armstrong in a sheer top:

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And Giselle Bundchen doing what she does best - looking hot:

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Dec 18 2007

“Piece Of Me” broke the computers

Posted by: Chaoz in Has-Beens, Britney, Music

pieceofphotoship.jpg

Well Britney has unleashed her new video “Piece Of Me”.  In it she talks about something that we of course, can all relate to…
I’m Miss American Dream since I was 17
Don’t matter if I step on the scene
Or sneak away to the Philippines (wha’?)
They still got pictures of my bare rear in the magazine (yeah, “Oinkers Monthly”)

 

I’m Miss bad media karma
Another day another drama (that you make Brit)
Guess I can’t see no harm
In working and being a mama
And with a kid on my arm (and cigarette in the other)
I’m still an exception
And you want a piece of me
 
I’m Mrs. Lifestyles of the rich and famous
I’m Mrs. Oh my God that Britney’s Shameless (and fuckin’ nuts)
I’m Mrs. Exta! Extra! this just in
I’m Mrs. she’s too big now she’s too thin
Enough.  “Too thin”???  Can someone please show me in magazine where she was labeled “too thin”?  Maybe in National Geographic where the compared her to a bull elephant, but that’s the only one I can think of.
Oh and to top it all off.  As you can see above, apparently they Photoshopped Miss Thang IN EVERY FRAME - which explains why you don’t see much of her below her chest.  Rumor is she took out 2 Cray Supercomputers in the process.
>sigh< Well, here's the video - if you REALLY want to watch it...
You need to a flashplayer enabled browser to view this YouTube video
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Dec 18 2007

HQ Batman Preview Now Online

Posted by: Chaoz in Movies
You need to a flashplayer enabled browser to view this YouTube video
Okay, call me a hopeless optimist but I think this movie has legs again. I’m talking about The Dark Knight. As a DC fanboy, I still don’t like the fact that Heath Ledger is only wearing white on his face. I could spend an hour why this is wrong, but my Nerd Quotient is already in 4 figures so why add to it?

Kudos go to Heath Ledger for seemingly pulling this off. He channels Jack Nicholson without the scene eating that Jack did in Batman. Most of the previous cast is here as well though Katie Holmes was stuck in HubbardLand and passed.

Now, it’s possible that can still suck monkey balls but my interest is piqued once again; so here’s hoping.

JUST ADDED - THE FIRST SIX MINUTES OF “THE DARK KNIGHT” - THE PROLOGUE (shown as a preview prior to “I Am Legend”)

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Granted, it’s a little fuzzy but hey - you work with what you got.

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Dec 18 2007

Meet The New Bond Girl Looks Like A Boy

Posted by: Chaoz in Miscellaneous Shit, In Denial, Cinema Sins

gemma-arterton.jpgberriesandcreme.jpg

Well, according to The Daily Stab, British actress Gemma Arterton is the new Bond girl (she’s the one on the left, by the way):

British actress Gemma Arterton of the show St. Trinian (what show??) will be the next Bond girl. She has only been in a handful of films. The 22-year old beat out 1,500 other women to co-star with Daniel Craig in the movie which is tentatively titled Bond 22. Filming is set to start in January.

After getting the confirmation, Arterton sent an SMS to her mom saying, “I got Bond!”

An insider at the Bond studios Eon Productions said, “She has the modern look.”

Apparently, “the modern look” is kinda gay. Couple this with the fact that Bond is supposed to go buff in the next flick and - well - “Thunderball”* suddenly takes on a whole new meaning, doesn’t it? Not saying she’s not an attractive girl, but right now she has hairstyle that Michael Jackson and Tom Cruise would really go for, y’know.

* - it was either that or “Goldfinger”, eww.

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