As I type this it’s actually like 12:30AM (shit, if I posted when I typed all my stuff up; you guys would never read it!). Anyway, as I type this I’m staring at 13 different Britney Spears posts from the last few days. Jesus, doesn’t this bitch sleep or anything? I swear it’s like she’s cloned herself and she’s got the 3 of her doing shit all at once. Ugh! Well, here goes…
Britney Calls In Sick: Not that this is surprising. Britney managed to avoid her deposition again. This time? She called in sick. No, really.
According to K-Fed’s attorney Mark Vincent Kaplan, Britney Spears has some sort of medical condition or illness that prevented her from showing up to today’s court-ordered deposition.
Sources say Britney Spears is defying the legal process and has decided not to attend her deposition. One source directly in contact with Britney tells us, “There’s a million people outside of her house. She can see all the other madness (presumably she’s looking at our live streaming video). The anxiety is making her sick. It’s just too crazy.” (source)
There’s more, but honestly - do you really want to read it? If so, click…
Children Services Looking Hard At Brit: Last week, it was revealed that L.A. County’s Department of Children and Family Services is looking at “multiple child abuse and neglect referrals”.
“The Sensitive Case Unit … is currently investigating multiple child abuse and neglect referrals concerning the above-referenced parents and their family,” a legal filing reads. “The referrals are for general neglect and substantial risk.”
Spears’s lawyers did not respond to requests for comment.
On Oct. 3, Tony Barretto, the singer’s former bodyguard, had requested that the DCFS open an investigation into Spears, citing drug use and other questionable parenting by Spears.
The document, dated Oct. 25, is a request by the DCFS asking for access to sealed documents in the former couple’s ongoing custody battle, to aid their investigation. The court granted the request on Nov. 26. (source)
Am I the only one who thinks this is gonna a WHOLE lot uglier than it already is?
2008 Will Be Britney’s “Rebuilding Year”: Well, regardless of what happens with the kids, Britney will probably invest her earnings (from her Cheeto-eating career) in something “constructive” - constructive surgery that is.
While Britney Spears might have had some minor success (minor? It tanked! - UC) in revamping her career with her recent album, Blackout, the once-chart-topping singer still hasn’t reached the mega-hit status of her glory days. But instead of heading back into the studio to try again or go on tour to remind her fans how great she can be, sources close to the pop star tell OK! she’s only thinking skin deep.
So what’s Brit-Brit’s attack plan for being beautiful? A little bit of nipping here and tucking there, says the friend. She already underwent lip enhancement and forehead Botox on Oct. 18, a decision which the friend says was “spur of the moment.” But apparently Britney was pleased with the results so she’s singing “Gimme More” to the docs.
On her checklist: liposuction of the abdomen, hips and thighs ($18,000); a breast lift with change of silicone implants ($25,000); a mini tummy tuck ($18,000); and work on her nose ($20,000). Grand total: $81,000!
Should Brit go ahead with the surgery, this will reportedly be her second nose job and the third time she’s had breast work done. (source)
It’s nice to know she’s concentrating on what’s important to her life instead of that boring stuff like, oh, HER KIDS!!!
Britney Threatens Paris With Lesbo Sex Tape:
Brit has demanded that the heiress stop being rude to her and members of her entourage.
The troubled star has reportedly threatened to leak the footage, which shows Hilton in a compromising position with another woman, unless her attitude changes.
A source said: “The letter warns Paris that if she continues being rude to people, the footage will be leaked online.” (source)
At this point I hope there’s nothing left to write about. Aw, shit…
Britney Getting “Body-Doubled” For Magazine Shoot:
The 26-year-old Gimme More singer is baring all in a recreation of an iconic Marilyn Monroe photograph, but Blender magazine reportedly plan to swap her body with a more “in shape” model.
An advert placed in the magazine reads: “We are casting for a Britney Spears body double. You must have shoulder to medium length blonde hair. This person must also be in shape! 5′2″ to 5′5.
“This will be a take off of a Bert Stern photograph of Marilyn Monroe in bed, from the last shoot before her death. Your face will not be shown in the final photograph/cover.” (source)
TURN IT OFF! TURN IT OFF!!!!
Britney Sells Worn Clothes On eBay:
Ever wanted to get into Britney Jean Spears’ pants? Here’s your big chance, y’all. Penicillin sold separately!
An ‘I Sold It On eBay’ store in Los Angeles has started an auction for an outfit allegedly worn by the hoochie-flashin’, traffic-swervin’ popwreck. Up for grabs: one lime green Wet Seal tank top (medium) and a pair of size 7/8 Hydraulic jeans — otherwise known as Louisiana swamp black tie! Here’s hopin’ she wore underwear! (source)
::: Unca Chaoz jumps out of the window :::
AGGGGGggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!……………… >THUD
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