Remember when she was this hot? Yeah, me neither.
Well, I’m skipping the Chinese adoption thing, the fact that her album is now tanking – hard, and her latest upskirt (yawn). My poor brain can only tolerate so much stress. I will note that there are sex lives of some celebs I am curious about. But Britney? Uh, no. She lands somewhere between Zac Efron and Gus Van Zandt…
…and I don’t even know who the FUCK they are!
Anyway – it seems that the newest “scandal” (“Britney scandal”? Talk about redundant.) is her “sex palace” (*gasp*). From that monolith of journalism, The New York Daily News (via The Star):
(Star Magazine) alleges that the plummeting pop star’s Mulholland Drive mansion is equipped with a double-locked, X-rated “Fantasy Room” filled with ticklers, whips and fur-trimmed handcuffs hanging from the metal bedframe. (Please, hold your shudders until the end.)
The second-floor room also features a mirrored ceiling, a glass jar containing spanking paddles and a closet full of kinky outfits, according to an “insider” who stumbled into the den of sin.
“She wears Catholic schoolgirl uniforms, a maid’s uniform and a Cinderella outfit,” claims the mole. The source also contends Brit is so obsessed with Marilyn Monroe that she wants her nose redone to look like the blond model of self-destruction.
As the saying goes: this was where I threw up a little.
Nothing says “fuck me” like a trailer trash hooker dressed up in a schoolgirl uniform. Her beer gut hanging out and wobbling while she tries to sing “Hit Me Baby (One More Time)”.
*HORRRK!*
Shit. It reminds of the time I went to this little “stripclub” which was actually a bar with a pole in the middle of the floor. The bartendress would serve drinks for about 5 minutes then go to the pole, strip, move pathetically, get no tips, and then go back to the bar to serve drinks.
I stopped going there after a couple of years.
(Yeah, there’s also a bit about her house stinking like dog & baby shit; but c’mon – like that’s a fuckin’ surprise.)
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